Millinocket, Maine

I gave my Dunkin’ Rewards points to the elderly at Northern Light Continuing Care. I did not speak much before you left. When you left, I could no longer speak. Styloglossus and hyoglossus muscles distended. Physicians repeated the phrase never seen before. Brookfield Power, heating contractor, lost voltage all November. At different times, wall clock second hands froze. Ice cube warmer than AA battery.

Waitsfield, Vermont

Shrove Tuesday I cried and cried for my community like a Slavic Samaritan guided on a rope led by somebody dressed in a bear outfit when four acutely unaware bearded pilgrims on time-sensitive mission found me around Scrag Mountain Forest Parking Lot in heavy rain all four exited minivan all four asked me the fastest way to Green Rabbit Bakery I gave good directions I lost my virginity there.

Lebanon, New Hampshire

When I was smaller, I would avoid Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center, run straight to Jack Byrne Palliative & Hospice Care. Inside, the ancient candy dispenser. One slot-trapped quarter allotted the never-sanitized chipped metal knob crank to chute deposit Everlasting Gobstoppers. Mouth sucked on cue ball. Teeth like champagne. A wiser sicker patient asked a white wall who won the Battle of Kapyong?

Springfield, Massachusetts

We better not find out Larry Bird and Magic Johnson were CIA partners hired to quell paranoia after 1974 Boston bus riots. Nickelodeon lost broadcast rights to NBA games after a nice pitch. Basically they Green Screened the ball’s leather to look like a moving moon. Every rebound, made or missed shot or pass, QR codes popped up and took viewers fast to idiotic toys we thought we needed or deserved.

Old Lyme, Connecticut

We noted neighbors did not thank delivery drivers. Neighbors noted we thanked as if we knew delivery drivers. Apps told us their first names, greeted us by apps names. Is anyone right, really? Are petulance and politeness equal user errors? We now wonder though, did neighbors ask why we recognized delivery drivers? Were we secret delivery drivers? Were they living beside delivery drivers?

Watch Hill, Rhode Island

Something felt remiss. Each Maryknoll Sister of St. Dominic let me rest on the porch, insisting the ending of the world, and asking if I was going to be okay. God knows I said. God knows they did not believe me. Members of The Misquamicut Club planted business cards in the sensory garden. Who else saw me upon my knees, assumed I loved Zinnia, or prayed? Nuns rejoiced my manure company.